Aug 31, 2006

wanna chicken burger?**

this is not mine, but a close relative of mine's and i thought it rather apropo for today's presidential theme.

I had a dream where I was in a Chinese graveyard and a weird Chinese man was mumbling incantations that brought dwarf suits of armor to life ala Bedknobs and Broomsticks. These animated dwarf suits of armor grabbed me and carried me into a high tower where they shoved me into a cannon and fired me. I landed in the courtyard of Buckingham Palace and ran inside. I came to a large banquet hall/cafeteria and in adjoining kitchen I ran into George Bush who had just pulled a pan of chicken burgers out of the oven. He turned to me and said, motioning to the chicken burgers, "Wanna chicken burger?"

as a warning to anyone thinking of asking me to be a model for their class project. please, learn from courtney's mistake.

where at least i know i'm free

The president of the United States drove by me today. He was or wasn't in one of these black armored suburbans. He was accompanied by many many large men with machine guns. (their windows were down so we could all see and fear them) I waited about an hour to see or not see him for about 15 seconds. Many watchers were disgruntled by the interruption of their schedules, others were clueless to the significance of the event, others disappointed by the entourage and still others, determined to make this into a soapbox. "I just wanna catch the bus," "no man should be this important," "now's the time to commit a crime, every cop in town's right here," "that's it?". As for me, I'd have waited eight hours for those fifteen seconds. I can't explain it. I'm sure it's mostly from being Rachel's daughter. But I loved it. Did I get chills? Of course. Did I get teary-eyed? Probably. Will I stop smiling about the old man, decked out in his old military uniform, complete with cap, waiting on the street next to me? I doubt it.

Aug 30, 2006

Aug 29, 2006


Yesterday i discovered some supernatural talents that are housed in my very body. first, that i can sleep in a lovesac all night long, comfortably and not feel any pain the next morning. second, that i can make it from 200 east, provo to 200 south, slc without missing a green light. and third, that i can survive (and escape unscathed from) three unique windshield chipping experiences in one day.

Aug 28, 2006

"all a girl wants is someone who wants her back"

well said, Brooke. i don't know why i ever doubted your wisdom. oh. yeah i do. but, friend betrayals and fabricated pregnancies were so first season. that's all behind us now.

Aug 25, 2006

the perks of being a daughter

friday afternoon lunch with my mom. after she'd walked to the temple for a session. and now she's napping on a couch in the lounge area of the studio waiting for me to be done working. she doesn't think she could live here with all the Mormons and the long blocks. i love her.

Aug 24, 2006

i used to be so audacious

from mrs. hunter. parkview elementary. taft, ca. 1990-1991. with love.

love is like a magic penny
hold it tight
and you won't have any
lend it, spend it
and you'll have so many
they'll roll all over the floor

(you sing it)

Aug 23, 2006

i pick weird things to care about.

i'm not a mean person.

i just have an unreasonably low tolerance for stupidity. it's hereditary.

Aug 22, 2006

Happy Happy Birthday

these are some things i will never understand:

- traffic
- blatant disrespect for other people's property
- bret baker's msn account activity
- colorblindness
- pre-marriage pregnancy
- the things boys do and say
- why people smoke
- why people started saying 'sherbert'
- technology


i'll work under my own name. do things in my own name. not under the alias of a successful businessman.

Aug 14, 2006


today, at work, a boy used the girls' restroom and left the seat up.

with this ring...

why do people who are married sometimes not wear wedding rings? that's a risky little game.

find a little star and put it in your pocket...

I was rather indulgent this Saturday. Sleeping in until 10 should have been my first indication that I’d be taking my own advice (do what you want) for too seriously. One of my favorite past times is watching a movie in the morning. this is only really possible on Saturdays. This morning I replaced my usual viewing choices (How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Hitch, Pride and Prejudice) with a double header of the most recent season finale of The Office. And thus, the mood for my day was set. Only to be reinforced by dewy-eyed episodes of the O.C., a pure sobfest during Raising Helen and of course a sigh, sniff, sign ensemble through my personal staple, Love Actually. My spontaneous haircut (and added splash of blonde) and olive garden on me couldn’t have been more at home. I guess I like to show a lot of unreasonable emotion while experiencing hollywood’s life so that i can remain the ever-stoic kate in my own. Yeah, I don’t want to talk about it.

Aug 11, 2006

i do what i want

it has become glaringly apparent to me lately that in most areas of life, the saying 'do what you want' will not ruin you. nay, it will not even hurt you. not at all. not any more than any other philosophy. perhaps, in fact, it is the ticket to success. why o why will it matter if i eat a peanut butter twix? buy chocolate milk? talk to my ex? reveal my un-talent for whistling? take a lunch break at 3pm? stay up too late? sleep in my bathing suit? go to a concert at uvsc? wear a t-shirt with dinos on it? matters not. i wanted to. and i did. and i'm better for it. honestly, i've been charting my 'life success and overall happiness' for the last 6 months, the last month being the start of this new creed and there has been no unusual dip in progress, no downward spiral of depression, no cash in on bad karma. none. so there it is, folks. do what you'd like to do. and your life will be perfect.

yes. i need to renew my driver's license...

sometimes i answer the phone where i work. and sometimes people think they've called the dmv. i guess, although personal research has failed to prove this point, our numbers are similar. at any rate, the people calling never listen when i say 'struck. this is kate' they just start right in with their questions/problems/concerns. "yes. hi. i need to renew my driver's license next month but the thing is that i'm going to be moving in three months. do you think i should just wait and do it there or is there an easy transfer process. i mean, what types of forms would i need to bring to just have like a temporary license and then get one when i move. is that the best bet?"...breath..."i'm sorry. you've got the wrong number. this isn't the dmv." and then...this is the part that always really gets me...they come back with some type of short remark, always in this 'how dare you not be the dmv' tone. "oh. alright. i'm sure this is the right number. bye" as if i'd tricked them? as if i'd had every 100th call made to the dmv wired to my direct line? just for this very experience? as if, people.

back to the future**

thank you Tuesday Kate for leaving Friday Kate some Ritz crackers in the desk drawer. it was awful nice of you.

Aug 9, 2006

mates of state

someday a boy will look at me like Jason Hammel looks at Kori Gardner.

Aug 7, 2006

i want one

thanks, mom

i was, today, reminded of a thing my mother did for our family. something i had almost forgotten. (which is tragic, because i am becoming my mother, and without this vital piece, i'd never make it) anyway, her series of 'moments' presented at family home evenings are the thing i was reminded of. thanks, mom, for all those 'etiquette moments', 'grammar moments', 'heritage moments', 'language moments' (phrases in new languages), 'cleaning moments' and most likely lots of other 'moments'. sometimes she would turn over the next series of moments to one of her children. but we were never quite ready for that. i mean, little johnny tried to stay on top of his 'lawn mowing and other outside chores moments' but were any of us, his 5 sisters, really going to listen? it wasn't his fault. anyway, i'm starting to think that i'm ready for such a responsibility. my family is going to be so lucky. it took my mom till age 40-something to start her 'moments' rolling but i've got a 20 year head start on that. "thanks, grandma" my kids will say. and they'll mean it, too. not sarcastically like you may have read it the first time, but sincerely, deep downly. thanks, mom.

"congratulations. you...just...lost him."

when will boys start realizing that there's no good reason to break up with us? only a bunch of non-reasons. and, you're right, it's not me. it's you. (this isn't even about me. but, it's about the world. the whole world. it's messed up.)

cual casa es mi casa?

i don't know where to live.

Aug 4, 2006

is that even possible?

am i expected to find someone i like being around/talking to more than my own family? because, i'm sorry, but that will be really really difficult. i wish i could post every conversation had with said relatives. but it wouldn't be the same to everyone else. anyway, i love my family.

it's a nice day for...

i had quite the night last night. but i feel great this morning. weddings exhaust me. friday morning donuts exhilarate me. we had a BBQ at work today. and it was actually girly! (girly=side dishes, dessert, non-carbonated beverages) for once! chips and salsa are always so good. my music is on party shuffle and i haven't had to skip a song yet. and it's 1:36. that's almost unheard of. but i'm in a mood to let 'O holy night' and 'the way you look tonight' run their courses. it's a good mood to be in. when i get impatient with music, it's never a good sign. not sure why i'm feeling so autobiographical lately, but i am. maybe i'm going to die soon, or something.

Aug 3, 2006

i could have had it all

yesterday morning i woke up cold. a sensation i haven't felt in months. i wanted to shower, to warm my body. i'd almost forgotten that any season besides hot existed. driving to work was much more enjoyable due to the company of my friend V. (it was take your daughter to work day) i showed her my new favorite game of hitting all the white plastic tab guys that stick up from the road. the ones i thought were hard and stiff as a child, until i walked right on top of one in a parade. you know the ones. so, there's a new guy working my parking garage booth. and he's a girl. not a boy at all. what were they thinking? they must have read my previous post and thought it a cry for help. i messed something up in a bad way at work. i was writing a proposal for a new website project. anyway, i messed it up, and we sent it to the company, all messed up like. one guy at my work was really upset. thank heavens he's a boy and will have forgotten all about it by today. i'm going to a wedding for an old roommate of mine today. well, going to a luncheon and a reception to celebrate the wedding of an old roommate of mine, i guess. so of course this has me thinking. about weddings and life. and the time when this roommate said to me "see. you should have gone on a mission. then you'd have it all." mind you, she meant no harm. yet, her position as an RM (since april) and fiance (since june) combined with those words was quite the twist. i can't deny she has a point. i mean, i can raise her 'all' a nearly completed college degree but we all know where that falls in comparison to a husband. at any rate, i'm very happy for her. I think i've decided to move into the basement of my current residence. i love a new place to live. with endless possibilities. there's lots of light down there and the cutest, smallest kitchen. i want to get some real mail. i hope i get some real mail pretty soon. last night i helped courtney revise her art history final. i realized that i don't hate writing papers at all. i can' think of a time i hated writing something. i mean, i get stumped as much as anyone, but i never hate it. i guess i'm going to grad school to get an english degree.