Gwen stood up and just like that, everything got harder. I'm not exaggerating when I say she tears this room apart. I know she is little, but she finds a way. She already prefers things she's not supposed to have. I am hoping this isn't a lasting quality or she'll be in for a lot of heartache. I feel bad when I try to divert her attention away from me when she comes begging for some interaction. Am I supposed to interact with her all day long? She's cute and I want to but it's tough! It's also hard to spend my day on the floor pulling her off of things that are going to hurt her over and over again while she wags her tongue and kicks her feet so obliviously. Except of course she's oblivious, and I want her to stay that way. I don't like being frustrated that she is so curious and adventurous and strong because these are all very good things. But spending my life within a protective arm's length of the sweet little darling, I'm feeling a little claustrophobic. If I walk by, she literally tries to grab on to my pants and climb up my leg, while I'm walking. There's no one I'd rather hang out with but come on, Gwen. Another example, I just put her down for a nap but when her whimpers turned to a scream, I went in to find her standing straight up in her crib, clenching the rails with a terrified look because she didn't know how to get back down. It was sad. It's like we can't win. But also like we can't lose? Because in 20-60 minutes she'll wake up, make some coos, then there's a cuddle and some happy bouncing and it's a fresh slate. And that's what we do all day long. Exhausting but also pretty incredible.
p.s. is it unrealistic to expect Spring to cure all of this?
p.p.s. It's okay to roll your eyes at my idea of a hard life
8 comments:
SO HARD! I actually appreciate the honesty cause it's gonna be tough stuff to be a mom. All day forever, no stopping. Good thing you are the best and funny and Gwen is darling and all is well. I love your life. I want a baby. and a husband.
This is the hardest stage for me. When you can't leave their side for even a moment. I feel your pain! (Or I guess I will in about a year. By then you will be happily on to a new fun stage hopefully.)
Oh I remember this! Definitely overwhelming. Also funny/sad when they can get up, but not back down in their crib. I remember that stage being frustrating, but it only lasted a few weeks and then it was on to something else!
I remember finding Sara in her crib standing up like that too. She also stood up in the corner of a room once and then had no idea how to get back down! So funny, those kids. I know you probably don't have a lot of extra space in your apartment for big baby toys, but I would recommend something like an Exersaucer or other similar toy she can sit in and bounce/jump/play while being CONTAINED! I bought ours used from online classifieds when Sara was 5 months old, and it has been one of the best things I have ever purchased in the way of baby items. They sure do take up a lot of space, but it's nice to be able to put them in there and get 15-30 minutes of not having to chase a mobile baby around the house!
this post made me lol because of your honesty. haha. i mean, poor kid is probably so confused with all this power. also, no one ever talks about this dark side of parenting so i'm glad for the heads up.
Everything's better in Spring. Sometimes I do roll my eyes at myself for thinking it's hard, but it actually is just hard.
One of the best things about babies and children is the fresh slate. No matter how traumatic the morning has been, after the nap they are so happy to see you. If the day was awful, the next morning they love you still. And is there anything better than the rosy sleepy face of a just waking up baby?
This is basically parenting in a nutshell. You love them, but you get sick of them. There is this idea that by the time you stop getting sick of them, they stop loving you. I think it is false and refuse to live my life assuming one day my kids will hate me.
But I think it's definitely true that I've liked every stage more than the last. That applies to each baby's life, and our whole family as it grows too.
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